Q&A: Meeting Others

Q: How does a single Orthogal meet single Orthoguys?

A: Meeting other Ortho-folk is just like any other. You go out with friends to events, you search online, you take the suggestions of seminarians who want to set-up their classmates, or you let monastics and your Khouria/Matushka/Presvytera know. (I’ve been told that nuns can be effective matchmakers). The good news is that meeting other Orthodox singles is the same process for meeting people in general.

For those open to online dating, I cannot recommend any particular website for those open to online dating. Be looking for an Orthogal round table discussion and review of websites this month.

What I have observed to increase the effectiveness of meeting “marriage-minded” singles are three things. One, let others know you are open to dating and marriage. And not just “Hey, I want to get married someday.” Let them know a few specifics – Tall? Serious? Humor? Passion for social injustice? Hates or loves music theater just as much as you?

Two – live a life that you can and want to share with someone.

Third, be patient with yourself and others. Keep up the openness to meet others, even if it feels like one more first conversation that might not go anywhere. We can’t all have Yente’s talent…

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Categories: Articles, Q&A | 6 Comments

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6 thoughts on “Q&A: Meeting Others

  1. Julie

    Point 2 is interesting! Care to expand?

  2. I met my husband through a mutual church friend. From experience and observation, there seem to be two paths Orthodox singles take to get to marriage today: being introduced through a trusted friend to another single with the same values as you who is already Orthodox, or, opening your prospects to non-Orthodox singles who show a willingness to learn about the faith/go to church with you to see what it’s all about (“Come and see”, etc.). My life took me on the former path, and I think the latter path is a lot more complicated but I know at least one good friend who is taking that path.

    I *love* this though: “Two – live a life that you can and want to share with someone.” I could have used that advice at some points before meeting my husband, though I think/hope/believe I had reached a place of loving life for what it was just before I met him.

    • Thank you, Donna! I will confirm your observations on the paths Ortho-folk take – and yes, the latter is more complicated as you are not guaranteed that the person will even want to “come and see.”

      I was talking with a friend today who is open to a relationship but recognizes that she does have a life and things to do. I encouraged her that she has a good attitude, in that, she is not desiring a man then wanting life to happen, she has a life and will see if a man happens.

  3. Pingback: Q&A: Long Distance Relationships | Orthogals

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